But I need it...

Church was pretty good today. Steve Carter talked about Moses, and the first passage in the bible that introduces him is when he kills an Egyptian and buries him in the sand. Something I never knew. In some part this saddens me, because I always looked up to Moses in some way, haha. In another part it saddens me because I should have known this and the fact that I didn't is somewhat pathetic. I really need to start reading my bible again.
Anyways, he talked about PostSecret! I am always telling people about that website and definately check it frequently. About how these people send in these postcards with their secrets on the, but is it really making them feel better? If the secret is still within them, then they aren't bringing justice to themselves, and it's only enslaving them and keeping them in bondage even wonder. He asked everyone, "What is your secret? What is keeping you in bondage?" I am not sure that I have a secret. Or maybe I am just so in denial about it that I believe it's not true. Definately need to think about it some more I guess.
House church met at Dave and Jenny's and we had a barbeque. We also watched the Nooma "Kickball", which is about how we ask God for things.....we want things...but God we need it...and when he says no, we get angry. But I thought you loved me.....it is so true. Or how in your life when all of the sudden things are not going the way you want them to be going and then you start to pray and beg God. I honestly believe that these things happen to us because we need to be broken down and humbled constantly. It's almost His way of saying, Come back to me, rely on me, I am all you really need. Have faith in me. I need to try to remember this more everything. See God in everything, everywhere, in everything I do. To remember to pray constantly. To put my life in His hands instead of trying to control things myself.
I feel like now that I quit the salon, a heavy burden has been lifted. Like I can live my life the right way now. Like God is giving me a second chance, a second chance to make the right choices this time. To love the people that surround me, to be a light to them. I pray that I can be like Jesus to them.
Tomorrow I am going to Crystal Manor to check out this job. Everything will work out how it's supposed to.